Does life treat us as we deserve? - through these gray eyes...: Does life treat us as we deserve?

Wednesday, 28 January 2015

Does life treat us as we deserve?

Something came up in conversation the other day which has been going over and over in my head: 

"We all buy into the idea that life treats us as we deserve"

Most people I think (me included) probably do, unwittingly though. The feeling of unfairness because you think you're a good person and something horrific happens to you... The "Why ME??" moment, where occasionally the existence of God is questioned... whether you believe in Him or not it's either a questioning moment or a moment to grab at the unfairness as proof that He doesn't exist.

Then you look about you and see that other people don't seem to be having problems and 'what did you do wrong?'... the other people are no better than you. It's almost like a default reaction when something bad happens.

Life doesn't operate on a scale of fairness... lets face it, how can it? Life is a heart beat, breathing, creating, and expiring. It doesn't treat us. What happens, just happens. Realistically you cannot control what happens to you by being a 'better' or 'worse' person.

We can, however, affect how other people treat us by being a good or a bad person. All the many sayings about 'do as you would be done by' and 'what goes around, comes around' enforce the idea that someone will get you back if you are nasty to them. Unless you find the nicest person in the world to be horrible to eventually someone will give you a taste of your own medicine. This surely effects how simple our life is... whether we are dodging bullets or laughing our way along.

I am ridiculously superstitious about certain things... I can walk under a ladder just fine, step on every crack, put an umbrella up inside, enjoy Friday 13th without the smallest concerns that things might go wrong.

But, I believe that bad things come in threes... realistically (now that I think about it) that's because I gather the bad things myself. Not because bad things actually come in threes. As soon as something bad happens rather than letting it go I hold onto it and lie in wait for the next until I get to three and then I stop and relax because that's the end of the bad things for a bit.

I also think that if I were to lose my wedding or engagement rings our marriage would be doomed and I really, genuinely used to believe that if I put up too many photos of me and Tom then everything would go sour. The whole idea of speaking too soon or enjoying things too much really scares me as if something tiny can destroy all my happiness.

I've been pretty lucky with my life recently (getting married and all that jazz) and I am slightly waiting for everything to go wrong. I don't know whether that is down to not being used to being happy or whether I really think life treats us as we deserve. 

Do you think life treats us as we deserve or does it just happen?

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